Hey, First I want to say, that I don’t think you are letting your parents down by telling them that you are gay. Most often being honest is the best thing to do and with you having the nice parents, they might just be cool about it. Maybe they will need some time to get used to the idea, just like your did and I did.
Second, no matter what, you are only responsible for yourself, what you say, do or feel, you are not and you will be never be responsible for your parents feelings and for your brother.I have known a couple of gay guys who had a gay brother and it was not a problem in their families.
I dont know if you realize that the words you use when you write about gay are negative. As if being gay is bad or a problem, but is not bad or a problem. Being gay is beautiful and great. Ok, at first we have to get used to it and so do our families but then its fun :) And we are as important in every family as any other family member. If being gay was like inferior to being straight, the evolution would have made sure a long time ago that there would not be born any gay children. We are here for a reason, the reason is that gays are good for humanity.
Good luck with your coming out, I understand why you are struggling and that the idea of your brother might be gay too is making it much more difficult. But you dont have to come out before you ready, just do it when you feel its the right moment and try not to worry too much about your brother, he has to do his own thing. And you are welcome to write me again anytime. Take care, Jens
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